He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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