yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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