fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
if only i could text you this smell
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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