East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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