just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
