got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
the room spins SO much faster in panama
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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