Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize