i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
