I skipped work to stalk him.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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