He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
