i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
