me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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