I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize