Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
