I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
