Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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