I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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