No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
