I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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