I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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