Well apparently he's into motor boating.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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