why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
