I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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