The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
