Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Randomize
