You just made me feel so damn special
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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