I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
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i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
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I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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