im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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