Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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