the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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