he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Randomize
