when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
