I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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