Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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