everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
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