I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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