How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
one might say we're banned from that church
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
