So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
