then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
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