when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
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