Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
