Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
