so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
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Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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