she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
