Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
