who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
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