its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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