he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Randomize
