How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
