I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
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