Whod you bang
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
